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DTRH Radio Show
On the radio, take a listen and enjoy the show. Inspirational and insightful.
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/dtrh-podcast/id1488262542?i=1000532196540
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Sharing the Light
Had an interesting conversation today with a supposed friend.
My daughter asked her daughter (both are High School Sophomores) to come with us to a faire this weekend. My son was willing to give her his ticket.
Well, this “friend” proceeded to insult the concept of the faire and my spirituality as well. The faire is a spiritual fun event, similar to a spiritual Woodstock. Live music, entertainment, vendors, spiritualists, food and drink (no alcohol). She said the faire will stir up the “devil in people.” She has never been to this faire before. Her daughter is very ill with an eating disorder and is interested in attending with my family. We were trying to bring her with us somewhere positive and full of light.The whole conversation brought to light how people judge what they don’t understand and instead of trying to understand it they would rather shame it. Similar to how people with a mental illness are treated.
Her daughter is very ill with an eating disorder. She needs to go into residential treatment for it. I hope she doesn’t carry shame and prevent her daughter the treatment and understanding she deserves. She is not open to talking about it in great detail. We need to not be afraid to talk about mental illness. We need to not be afraid of the implications or stigma. If we don’t talk about it –NOTHING WILL CHANGE.
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It’s reading time…
My passion is writing and speaking about mental health but I also spend a lot of time reading and researching about mental health. Here’s some books I have my eye on to check out. Let me know if you’ve read them and if they enlightened you. As they used to say in my elementary school, readers are leaders!
I did see Silver Linings Playbook with my significant other.
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Revive Ministries
I was on the Revive Ministries podcast, with the topic “Finding Freedom through Adversity.”
Being adaptable and mutable has been my lifesaver throughout the years. Plus I always believe in a better tomorrow.
Enjoy the podcast.
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Love-Listen-Talk-Repeat Podcast
I had a lovely conversation with Dr. Wendy Capewell. Check it out below, it will be posted on July 28, 2021.
Wendy is in the UK and I am in the US, but we both understand the issues surrounding mental illness, treatment and the need for supports. Mental Illness is a global pandemic that nobody seems to want to cure.
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Death
I had a death in my immediate circle recently. It was an ex-boyfriend who evolved into a close friend and confidante.
The grief hit me hard. I couldn’t concentrate and I was engulfed in sadness and regret. We had a story together that was suffice to say, unconventional, but it was our story. Yes, our star-crossed story.
His ex-wife and grown children blamed me for the break-up of his former marriage. In their distorted view, if I hadn’t appeared in his life, he would have agreed to return to his loveless sham of a marriage for longer than the 20 years he already participated in it. He decided to leave his marriage of his own accord, for his own happiness.
And we were happy. For years, seven to be exact. People that knew him said he was never happier. Pictures show him laughing and smiling. Unfortunately, life was just a mess for both of us through those years. We were each other’s solace and escape. Most importantly, we were friends. We were best friends. We spoke the day he had that fateful stroke. We spoke about both our lives and our futures and when the conversation was drawing to a close, we didn’t know how to say goodbye to each other. It would be the last time I heard his voice in this lifetime.
His death devastated me. We had been there for each other for years and now he was gone. His family was cruel to me during his impending death too. His vascular and heart problems that we didn’t know about had now left him paralyzed, unable to talk or swallow. His family let me know about the stroke but then thwarted me from seeing him in the hospital. A mutual friend was allowed to visit him and I asked her to let me FaceTime with him, which we did. He communicated with me by blinking. He told me he wanted to see me, alas, he died a few hours later. I know he wouldn’t die until we saw each other, albeit on a screen.
I never really knew how depression could leave someone so unmotivated until this experience. I fell behind in my work and household chores. I felt like I was alive but as a spectator only. I think I finally understood more about depression than I ever did. His death also tested my faith and spirituality. I realized that I had to let my sadness and despair run it’s course. There were no words that anyone could say that would snap me out of it. As I moved more to center I understood what my significant other and son have been telling me for years. Just be there for us and let us work through our emotional pain. I used my grief to understand their mental illness journey better.
I do plan on holding a memoriam for him around his birthday. I will celebrate his life and the life we once shared.
I appreciate all the lessons he taught me and the kindness he showed towards me and my family. He understood my son was not always well and supported me through it. I am forever grateful.
RIP RC, always in my heart.
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Getting the Word Out
I’ve always been a helper. From a young girl, I was the one who wanted others to be happy and feel safe. As I got older, these characteristics became both a burden and a blessing. I choose to look at them as a blessing now but I have also added some boundaries along the way.
I really enjoy helping and teaching others who want to learn and better themselves.
That’s why I love my advocacy work. I get to talk to people about mental health and illness. I get to share my stories, hear their stories and discuss best practices. I get to practice mindfulness and selflessness.
Today, my piece about ADHD was published. Please read and support this great new magazine. I will be a regular contributor.
https://www.flipsnack.com/IAMHER/i-am-her-4.html
Stay tuned for links to my upcoming podcasts and articles.
With peace and love,
LEJ
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That Damn Phone!
Escape, entertainment, distraction, soothing, sleep aid…that damn phone!
My teenagers are always on their phones but my folks with bipolar are ALWAYS and a day on their phones. The phone interrupts true conversation and intimacy. The phone is used as an escape from their lives. The phone distracts their busy minds with useless noise.
The phone is their pacifer.
The phone can bring some terrible stuff into the bipolar fold. Violent videos, gaming, porn, the opportunities to cheat, avoidance of responsibilities, online gambling. Excess and destruction all around. Add in mania and you have a recipe for disaster.
How do we get them off their phones? They need to be called out and engaged. They need to know that the phone does not solve any problems or cure them, it is merely a distraction from the truth of their lives. There is no panacea to feel better. It takes treatment, medication, therapy, good supports and time to form better coping patterns and mechanisms.
When I look at those phones, I see pain. I see anguish, I see isolation.
I truly hate the damn phones!
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Let’s Mind Mental Illness Together
Welcome to my blog!
I am a Mental Illness Advocate but most importantly I’m a loved one to people diagnosed with a mental illness. I have watched and walked with my loved ones as they have navigated the cruel world of mental illness.
I have lived through the school of hard knocks with mental illness. My now estranged sister, my teenage son and my significant other all have struggled with mental illness. I have had mental illness orbiting me my whole life. I have witnessed what mental illness does to a family and to the people trying to manage it. I have seen my loved ones in psychiatric hospitals, threatening suicide, aggressive and violent, depressed for months, unable to work, unable to go to school, resisting treatment, unmedicated, undermedicated and overmedicated.
The only thing that has kept me going at times was love and hope. The love for that person and the hope for a better tomorrow.
I have cried. I have worried. I have prayed. Mostly alone.
But I believe I have been chosen. Chosen to tell their story and importantly the stories of those who support the mentally ill.
Join me on my journey.